Passion

I think it's important to have a passion in life, I also think it's one thing to have a passion & it's another thing to pursue that passion. So why aren't I?

Does everybody have a passion? Yes. Has everybody found their passion? No. I don't think there should be any rush to find one, you'll end up forcing one. I think it comes naturally and when it's found, you'll feel much better for it because it will just feel right. One of my old school teachers told me that he didn't find his passion until he was 44. Who's to say you should rush?

It's easy to say that you'll pursue a passion; it's easy to make plans and it's easy to say 'this will happen'; I don't know. Things can get in the way: money, time, confidence, knowledge, motivation - life. Life can get in the way. it depends on what end of the perspective spectrum you're on. All of the aforementioned factors are excuses, no doubt about that - if you have a passion, that is your motivation. That is what will bring out the very best and the very worst of you. That is what you will struggle for, what you will dream about and it is what will drive you forward.

My passion is filming. Filming bands for Croft Sessions. I love doing it, everything about it. I love finding bands, spending time with talent, learning and listening to their passions. Watching the way they talk about their love for music and really feeling the energy - then transferring that energy into film and releasing it is something that makes me feel so good and so accomplished. I just want to learn and become better and better at it.

I know for a fact that I have been neglecting my passion. It pains me, it does. I hate that it's happened and I hate that it feels like it's 'on hold' while 'real work (read: 9-to-5)' takes over. Don't get me wrong - I do like my job, even at the worst of times. I just honestly hate the fact that filming has had to take a side-step. It shouldn't; it never should have and it's my fault.

During this time I am going to be really strict to myself, I need to focus and put more energy into what I truly love and I know I will feel much better about myself; even if I'm surrounded by a majority who don't give a fuck about what they do - I'll feel significantly better about myself if I stop slacking.

2013, I'm coming for you.